I’ve been waiting for the Season 2 Premiere of The Soul Man! Join me (@blkgrlunmasked) and @blackandmarried tomorrow night (Wed. 6/19 from 10:30 p.m. – 11:30 p.m. EST) for #TheSoulMan live Twitter viewing party. The Soul Man (TV Land) features Cedric the Entertainer (as R & B superstar turned minister Reverend Ballentine) and Niecy Nash (Lolli, the Reverend’s wife).
Click here for all of the details for tomorrow night’s party hosted by Black & Married with Kids: http://bmwk.me/11WHj1G.
*This is a part of a compensated campaign with TV Land. All views & opinions expressed are my own.
Caption: I was three months pregnant in this pic!
In December of 2011, at 5 months pregnant I went into premature labor and gave birth to a little girl who did not have the capacity to survive on her own outside of my womb. Subsequently (THANK GOD!) I found out the issue in order to try to prevent it from ever happening again and now my husband and I are ready to try again.
I decided that I wanted to share my story, because I know that I am not alone. 6.1 million women have difficulty either getting or staying pregnant in the United States.
It takes a lot of strength and patience to push through fertility issues but I know that when the day comes it will not only be the happiest moment of my life, but it will also be my greatest accomplishment. There tends to be a lot of shame when it comes to fertility issues, but really some things are outside of our control and we shouldn’t blame ourselves for those biological issues.
I’m asking for your support, as I will be publishing a story biweekly (on Wednesdays) over at Black & Married With Kids about this road to reproduction. I’m also asking for your prayers & your well wishes, because this is not an easy journey. Please check out the first article “A New Womb Mate:” http://www.blackandmarriedwithkids.com/2013/06/the-road-to-reproduction-a-new-womb-mate/. I’m starting from the very beginning of the story! To me, it is the best thing I can do to honor the little person whose life was so short but so meaningful to me, her father and our family.
“Be still and know that there is a universal power seeking an outlet through you.” – Iyanla Vanzant
We are all outlets for something… What are you allowing to “pass through” or “resonate” from you?
Are you an outlet for peace? Are others calmed or relaxed by your presence? or are you an outlet for confusion? A hub of gossip, insecurity and impatience.
Are you an outlet for positivity? Or do you have a million reasons why something can’t work with no suggestions on how it can work? Do you encourage others with your positive words and connect them with other people and resources to help them or do you block other people’s success?
Know without a shadow of a doubt that there is a universal power (the power that makes your life possible) within you. Whether or not you allow it to create and attract all that is good resides within you.
I recently attended the State of Black Chicago organized by our City Clerk: Dorothy Brown. Black Chicago has several crises including a dwindling population and a community ravaged by youth violence. There were committees that were organized around several areas including: [list the nine areas].
Throughout the day, representatives from each of the respective areas were asked to identify the major problems or challenges within their areas, but they were also asked to identify solutions that the group came up with. How many times do we have problems in our communities, our families or our lives and we focus most of our energy on the problem… Those problems look and sound like:
1. I don’t have enough money to pay all of my bills.
2. I have a horrible relationship with a close family member.
3. I’m unhappy with myself or with my life.
4. I hate my church and feel like I’m out of touch with God.
5. I have too much on my plate.
This list goes on and on. What I encourage you to do is ACKNOWLEDGE the problem and then spend the rest of your mental, physical and emotional energy thinking at the solution. If you don’t have enough money to pay your bills you can do one of the following, get a second job, go back to school to get certification and money that will allow you to make more money in your current position or start a side hustle.
If you have a horrible relationship with a family member, you can either decide to no longer deal with that family member or you can write that person a letter to tell them exactly how you feel. If you have too much on your plate, you can start saying no and turning over some of your responsibilities to others who have more time available.
You can’t solve a problem with more of the problem, you can only solve a problem by considering a solution. Imagine how silly it would look if fire fighters tried to fight fire with more fire. So start now, what are the biggest problems in your life and what can you do to address those problems?
Yesterday, I finished up a baby book for a dear friend and her sweet baby girl and I want to share some of my favorite pages:
The Womb Mate page is a staple in every baby book I create. It’s for the ultrasound pic.
This page is for pics and details about the baby from 0 – 3 months.
This page is for documenting 4 – 6 months.
The milestones page is one of the most important pages because you get to talk about when the baby does what and when the baby does it. From the first word to taking the first steps, the baby will be able to know EXACTLY when she did certain things.
I always include a Family Tree Page. Baby has to know that she has roots!
All of my baby books are customized. Not only do they incorporate the baby’s name, nickname(s), birth year and initials, but I also try to use favorite colors. If you’re interested in ordering a baby book please e-mail me: http://donnienicole.com/contact/. It takes about 4 weeks, but can be rushed for an additional fee. Although personalized I leave enough room for you to add lots of memorabilia and photos to truly make the baby book your own.
I had the opportunity to talk to my granny about her father, who she calls “Poppa.” I didn’t know anything about him as he passed away long before I was born. Please talk to the elders in your family about your family history! Ask lots of questions and document it. You may not be into scrapbooking, but even if you include the information in a journal or a typed document called “Family History” you will be able to pass along your legacy to your children.
Most families keep a family tree, but very few pass along stories. I’m going to continue to share information on how to document your history, but you can start with my free “How to Scrapbook” Guide. Simply subscribe to the blog on the home page by entering your e-mail and I will e-mail you the guide.
1. Study Abroad – Seriously even if I had to go over the summer or spend an extra semester, it would have been worth it to study for 10 – 16 weeks in another country.
2. Met more people – I met a lot of people, but now I wish I had met & kept in touch with more of a variety of people. In the working world, it’s all about who you know and I can’t help but think about how helpful it would be now if I knew more people in a variety of professions.
3. Took classes outside of my major – I wish I would have explored more classes in the arts and in psychology. I wanted to graduate in 4 years so I was very much focused on my major and didn’t veer off.
4. Immediately continued on with more education – The further away you get from graduation, the harder it is to go back. If I had been smarter, I would have finished my Bachelor’s and completed a combined Masters/Doctorate Program. What was I rushing for?
5. Published – The more you write, the better you become. I would have loved to have partnered with some of my professors to publish in academic journals.
6. Got more involved w/ President’s Office – I wouldn’t have wanted to be employed by the President’s Office, but I would have loved to be a fly on the wall to pick up some lessons on administration. No matter what field you go in to, it is important to understand how things work from the top down.
7. Played a sport (intramural or team) – I had the Freshman 30… Enough said.
8. More time w/ people of different races – I would have loved to know more about specific cultures. In High School I learned a lot about the Hmong culture, and I should have continued that cultural anthropology.
9. Studied another language – I should have continued to learn Spanish or picked up French or Arabic.
Filed under Reflection, Work
I am both a parent and a teacher in the Chicago Public School System. Please take a moment and read my latest post: “The Problem with Chicago’s School Closings” over at Black & Married with Kids (BMWK): http://blackandmarriedwithkids.com/2013/05/the-problem-with-chicagos-school-closings/comment-page-1/#comment-103298. Be sure to leave your comments over there and “LIKE” the post. Thank you!