The “F” in Friday Stands For…

Every week around this time (6:51 p.m.) … no matter what VIP table, conference room table or dining room table I find myself at, I have the same conversation with myself.


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It starts with my brain singing “….. WE MADE IT!”, internal fist pumping and slow head nodding. Fridays feel like the end of a marathon for me, so that celebratory energy soon morphs into… into horror movie piano keys, a knotty stomach and a blank stare.

It probably looks like I’ve been abducted by aliens.

What’s really going on is I’m scrolling through my memories to make sure I haven’t forgotten anything. I’m replaying as many of the conversations that I can recall and I’m flipping through the visuals of the many places my job takes me.

But that’s level one. It’s been about 30 minutes, because of course my memories play back at turbo speed. Then it’s time to open up the inboxes, check through text messages, and skim through notebooks and planners. Look through Google Calendar, check voice mail messages and for GOD’s SAKE go back and check the “SPAM” folder and the drafts folder.

It probably sounds like I have an imaginary friend, because at this point my internal conversation is pretty audible.

“IS THERE ANYTHING ELSE?” – I say out loud.

“When was that 100 page grant application do? The 10th?” – I say, trying to be a bit more quiet. Usually during this internal, external conversation my husband says “What was that babe?” So now I’m trying to whisper…

If I’m lucky this entire process takes an hour to 90 minutes. JUST enough time to squeeze in a movie with my husband, or some junk TV time.

If I’m not so lucky, then it flies out of me, like acid reflux – FUUUUUUUUU (DDDGE)! But the other “eff” word that makes me flinch when someone else says out in public. or giggle. or a fliggle, some weird combination of both. If I find multiple things, then the “eff” word gets joined by her other four letter friends, in varying combinations until I finish whatever task(s) that took the scenic route on my to-do list.

So Fridays used to be known as “TGIF” and they still are, when I’ve done everything I intended to do for the week. But when I haven’t, it becomes EFF!!! FRIDAY!!!! With lots of prayers to ultimately submit, e-mail, propose, construct, deny, confirm, edit or whatever verb by 12 am midnight.

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